A new kind of fairy tale.

A new kind of fairy tale.

This particular Mercury Retrograde (March 22nd- April 15th) continues to reveal itself as a time to undo old patterns, particularly those that have dominated our relationship dynamics over the last seven years. More specifically, we’re all being given a chance to rewrite our narratives: those that we’ve told ourselves, those imposed on us by our families, and those that society has ingrained in us since birth.

Even the strongest, most rational and independent among us are facing the harsh reality of life after the fantasy of “the other”- the soulmate, the twin flame, the one that- we were told- would complete us. If that’s not the story, what is the “new fairy tale”?

In working on our new tarot deck (with the very talented artist Emma Cook), I’ve been reminded of the story of Lilith- the first human ever created by God. In other religious traditions, the story doesn’t start with the Book of Genesis- there are many chapters that come before and several key characters- most notably the strong woman- that have since been edited out…and recast into the periphery as a “demon”. Classic.

But Lilith was just a cool broad. She was made first and perhaps built a little too complete. She looked at Adam, shrugged her shoulders, and left the Garden of Eden for a greater adventure. This is why Eve was made out of Adam’s rib- to create a codependent and subservient version of the female of the species and prevent the same kind of event from happening again. Of course, we all know how that worked out (eating apples, much, Eve?) and, if you look at the whole picture, it’s as though the Fall and all the shit that tumbled out afterwards was a product of a failed concept. A flawed narrative that should never have been written in the first place, let alone repeating since the dawn of time.

I think it’s a worthwhile endeavor to write a new fairy tale, a new narrative, one in which the princess isn’t saved from the dragon, but is the dragon. This was the inspiration for our Lilith (02- the High Priestess) tarot card- a woman so complete that the claustrophobic compromises of a traditional relationship were akin to spiritual foot-binding. This Lilith energy is incredibly powerful for all of us right now- she helps us simply remember who we really were in the beginning, before all of this went to hell in a handbasket.

There are countless articles and blurbs and clichés around the concept of “self-love”, but repeating a mantra isn’t enough. This isn’t something that’s solved intellectually or with a vision board or because you read “The Secret”. And no matter how successful you become, it’s likely there- lurking in your spiritual DNA. This story is gene-deep and needs to be reconfigured on the spirit level, individually and as a collective group. And it’s going to be hard- the “in between” space can feel lonely and disorienting. Reconfiguring our spiritual technology requires we “restart” before we can access our new software.

But it’s doable. And it’s worth it. And, to reinforce this TOTEM is no longer offering Relationship Readings (at least for the time being)- we’re going to focus on the whole you and making you whole. Well, that and our awesome tarot deck (more news to come on that soon!).